Lately, I’ve been feeling the need to write things down. Not because something is wrong, but because there are emotions in this season of motherhood that feel too big to hold inside. Sometimes I don’t even know how to fully explain what I’m feeling — I just know it’s there.

Every day, I look at Cecilia and I can’t believe she’s real. That she was once inside of me. That now I’m loving her, learning about her, and watching her become herself right in front of my eyes.

Motherhood has been beautiful… but it has also been overwhelming in a way that’s hard to describe. And honestly, I don’t think we talk about that enough. I know I can’t be the only mom who feels this mix of wonder and weight — like my heart is full and trembling at the same time.

The other day, I was cleaning up Cecilia’s baptism presents, putting things away and trying to make space. I came across a small frame with different faith-based phrases and devotionals inside. I started reading through them, thinking I might pick one to put in her room.

And then I saw a verse that stopped me immediately:

“Fearfully and wonderfully made.”
Psalm 139:14

Those four words instantly resonated with me. It felt like they summarized everything I’ve been feeling these past nine months. At first, I read it very literally. I thought: Yes. That’s exactly it. Pregnancy and motherhood have felt like that — fearful, yet wondrous.

I remember being pregnant and feeling so amazed, so grateful… but also so so scared. Scared of the unknown. Scared of doing it wrong. Scared of how my life was about to change. Holding a tiny life is both a miraculous and terrifying thing. So when I saw the word fearfully, I assumed it meant being afraid. But then I looked it up and what I found made the verse even more beautiful.

In Psalm 139, the word fearfully doesn’t mean fear the way we think of panic or anxiety. It means awe. It means reverence. It means something so sacred and profound that you can only respond with wonder. The verse isn’t saying, “I was made in fear.” It’s saying, “I was made with holy care.” With intention. With tenderness. With the kind of craftsmanship that makes you stop and breathe and motherhood has taught me what that kind of awe feels like.

When I look at Cecilia, I think… how is she so perfectly made? How does her body know how to grow? How does she already recognize my voice? How did God knit a soul into something so small?

Motherhood is wonder wrapped in responsibility. Joy mixed with vulnerability. A heart so full it feels almost too much and maybe that’s why this verse connected to me so instantly — because it holds both.

Now, when I think of that phrase — fearfully and wonderfully made — I don’t just think of myself.

I think of Cecilia.

I don’t know if I’ll ever stop being amazed that I get to be her mother. But maybe that awe is part of the point. Maybe motherhood is one of the ways God shows us, up close, how miraculous life is— how carefully and wonderfully God creates.

I love the reminder that she — and all of us — are made with such care. It’s a simple truth, but one I hope she always grows up knowing: she is truly fearfully and wonderfully made.